There is a saying about looking back.  It is not the one about turning into a pillar of salt.  It is the idiom claiming, “hindsight is 20/20.”  Frankly, it is easy to understand past events or decisions clearly after they have happened.  The future is, to say the least, murky.  The truth is that the future is subject to unexpected change.  The future is not yet written as is the past.  Obviously, the future has not happened yet.

The Old Testament story of Lot, as he escapes the destruction of the place that had become home to his family, is challenging, to say the least.  One of the provocative moments is when Lot’s wife longingly looks back toward that former home.  He and his family had been warned, by messengers of God, not to do so.  So, in an act of God, Lot’s wife became only a chunk of salt.

Frankly, it is impossible to live life without at least a few backward views.  Unless affected by a mental problem or illness, memories of what is behind us are simply a part of who we are.  The past goes with us wherever we go.  Even the youngest of babies draw from their past to gain what comforts them. 

There should be no doubt that backward views can sometimes be uncomfortable.  A song by the late Toby Keith offers the struggle of looking back, by pointing to the comfort of naïve ignorance.  He aptly titled the song, “Wish I Didn’t Know Now”.  Consider the lyrics, “I wish I didn’t know now what I didn’t know then.  I wish I could start this whole thing over again.”  Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, we don’t get to jump back in time and change what was done or not done.  There will remain those words we wish we had said or not said.  There will still be those deeds we did or didn’t do.  Choices of the past will remain what they were.  As discomforting as these backward views may be, they do provide the learning challenge to avoid repeating regrets.

From a little bit of a different viewpoint from the foregoing thought might be the old “ignorance is bliss” saying.  There is a kind of comfort in a lack of growing knowledge.  In certain respects, it seems that a significant proportion of individuals make minimal efforts to acquire affective knowledge.   Well, it may only appear that way.  Being stuck without learning is being the pawn of whoever or whatever may come our way. 

It may be that there are notable voices who have tried to remind us that a backward view is best when it is about learning and adapting to what is learned.  The common quote, “Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it,” is most often attributed to Winston Churchill.  There is also the statement by George Santayana, who wrote, “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it”.  A very pointed and a bit pessimistic quote is by Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel: “We learn from history that we do not learn from history.”  Looking back to our own past is best when it helps us shape the present and point us toward the best possible future.  Striving to return to that past is a wasted effort.  Outside of science fiction, time only moves in one direction: forward.

It may be the common disease of the maturing individual to spend a lot of time reflecting on the past, and maybe even refusing to let it be what it is, the past.  A dear old friend shared what he saw as wisdom from his father.  He told of his father completely retiring at the age of seventy-five.  He justified his retirement with the explanation, “Younger men are always looking forward to what may be.  By the time a man reaches seventy-five years of age his tendency is to be always looking backward.”  He may have been right for the majority.  I have to admit that I spend a lot of time thinking and talking about what used to be.  Sadly, I am only in my seventy-fist year.

Amid all those moments of looking backward there is a common phrase.  Many of us have literally stated it.  It’s sure we have heard it.  “If I had only known …” There are circumstances in our lives that we wish to be different.  There are words spoken.  There are unspoken words.  There are actions taken and untaken.  There are relationships that shouldn’t have been, and those that should have been.  The thought is, if we could go back in time, with the knowledge we have in the present, we could avoid the bad choices and mistakes we made.  It sounds like a great idea.  So, it is just a matter of inventing a time machine.  If H.G. Wells can imagine it, we ought to be able to do it.  Sorry, it just will not happen.  We cannot reverse the tide, and we cannot turn time backward.  There is no real “Quantum Leap” to engage the past.  Simply, but also profoundly, what is done is done.

Before we allow the unchangeable past to burden and depress us, there is a realization that we be best served to absorb.  It is obvious.  Still, it may be overlooked.  Here it is. “Without your past, you would not be here.”  Understand, and look around you. It is important to realize that all the experiences of the past, good and bad, are the things that have brought you and me to where we are.  What is realized today is what is learned from where we have been. 

It may be that from time to time we play the little game of pondering the question of what life would have been like if we had made a different choice at some earlier point in life.  Maybe it would have been a different career.  Maybe it would have been a different range of study.  Maybe it would have been a different place to live.  Maybe it would have been a different …. (whatever). What would life have been.  Yes, it would have been different. 

Again, look around you.  It is often easy to see the things that you wish were different, the things that are not at you had long ago hoped they would be.  Look again.  See the good things.  Maybe it is that you do have a job and you do it well.  Maybe it is that there is food on the table and a home in which that table is found.  Maybe it is that you have friends for whom you care, and friends who care for you.  Near the top of the list, maybe it is family.  Maybe it is the children who frustrate the daylights out of you and yet are still the ones whom you love and the ones who love you.  Perhaps you would not have the things that are precious to you.  Yes, there would be other things and other people.  Sure, we would not miss what we never knew.  But we do know.  All those “blessings” are a result of the past events and choices in our lives whether they were good or bad, as we see them now.

On the personal side, I do not want to imagine a different life.  I do not want the life that does not have my wife, our three children, their spouses, and those ten amazing grandchildren.  Not even one of us in that group is without challenges.  At the same time, all are immeasurable blessings.  Beyond family, there are all the wonderful people who have been a part of our lives in every place we have lived and worked.  Why in this world would I want any of those things to be different?

The old church song carries the reminder, “Count your blessings.  Name them one by one.  Count your blessings.  See what God has done.”  If we do, we just might come to a better state of appreciation for where we are.  So, instead of thinking, “If I had only known”, we might simply say, “I’m glad I didn’t know.”

Russell L. Dyer

December 31, 2025

Pets, especially dogs, have been a part of our home almost since our marriage began.  Some of the dogs were pure breeds, and some were a mixture of a wide variety of breeds.  Generally, we enjoyed each of them.  Beside the dogs, there were cats, birds, hamsters, turtles, and even a squirrel.  Some were with us for years, and others for much shorter times.  In reflection, of all the pets, it is dogs that seem to have the most recognizable place in our memories.

Allow me to tell you about Jasper.  Jasper is our dog of the present time.  We acquired him when he was a little over two months old.  At the time, we had lived without a pet for about seven years, and it always seemed that there was a little something missing in our home.  The children were all grown, married, had children, and even had dogs of their own.  Our house was empty, except for the two of us.  While not having the responsibility of caring for a pet was nice, there was still an empty place in our lives and home.  My occasional overnight absence brought my wife to mention being more comfortable when there was a dog present to be on guard for her.  Her comment stirred a renewed desire to have a dog in our home.  So, the search began.

Through something of a process, we settled on seeking a Collie.  It might have been that there had once been a Collie in her life, or that Lassie had always seemed to be the ultimate dog to own.  Whatever turned our attention in such a direction, it was where our search was pointed.  We quickly learned that Collies are not as popular as they once were, and maybe even less so in our part of the country.  In her search, Paula found a local breeder on Facebook.  After a few communications she learned that he still had a pup that he would be willing to sell to us.  His offering price was far more than we wanted to pay for a dog.  We almost let it pass.  Then he offered to sell the puppy at half price if we would forgo the registration papers.  Really, we only wanted the dog for a pet.  We did not intend to breed or show him.  So, we accepted the breeder’s offer.  The appointment was made.  The money was gathered.  Then on January 15, 2016, we met our dog.  At that time, He was just a small bundle of soft white fur.  It was love at first sight.  From that day forward to the present, Jasper has been an important part of our lives.  He has grown into a friendly, beautiful, White-Sable Collie, with penetrating blue eyes.  Rarely do we take him places that we don’t have strangers tell us that he is a beautiful dog.  We do love him, and he is devoted to us.  Well, the story to this point is just background.  Without doubt, just about any dog lover has just as good a good story about gaining a new dog.  So we relate.  As these words are being written, a nine-year-old Jasper is quietly resting in the entrance hall, next to the front door.  

So, it is my purpose here to share a few of the things I have learned from Jasper.  My conclusion is that any of us could all learn some good characteristics from our dogs. 

For example:

• Jasper is loyal and committed to (us) his own family.  He may never call us by name, but every approach he makes toward us tells us that he knows exactly how we are connected to each other.  Wherever and whenever we go, he wants to go with us.  He even seems happy to wait in the car (weather permitting) while we step into a store for a few minutes.  Really, the time he spends waiting doesn’t seem to faze him. 
• Jasper is open and friendly to just about everyone.  He never seems to meet a stranger.  New people or animals are greeted as friends he just hasn’t yet met, even the growling ones.  There may be a bit of sniffing, but in a very short time he is ready to share his company.
• Jasper doesn’t care what he looks like, or what you look like.  People often comment on how “beautiful” he is, but he doesn’t know it.  No matter how dirty he is, how shaggy he looks, or how he smells, Jasper is just as he is.  The way people look or are dressed means nothing to him.  Any friendly gesture is met with a friendly desire to touch and be touched.
• Jasper doesn’t hold a grudge.  Being a dog, he doesn’t always do the right thing.  Personal boundaries are not recognized.  So, when he is corrected, or even disciplined, he humbly accepts.  Then, whether immediate or long term discipline is applied, he is always ready to partner with you again.  The past may not be forgotten, but it sure doesn’t prevent having a full relationship with anyone.
• Jasper loves to “go” but always seems to be glad to be home.  He seems to always recognize when we are preparing to go somewhere.  Wherever we go, he is ready to go.  He seems to enjoy staying with other dogs in the family, whether the stays are short or long.  Then, when returning home, he seems to relax and find his comfortable place.  Home is where he is at his best.
• Jasper enjoys resting. He naps whenever he can.  Whatever else may be happening around him, he will lie down, close his eyes, and nap.  He rests without worrying that he needs to be doing something or that something will be missed.  He knows how to simply “let-go” and relax.

There are probably several more qualities that could be stated here, but we will stop with these.  For, these things may be enough to not the better qualities of a dog like Jasper.  Sure, he requires care.  We must feed, bathe, take him to the Vet, open and close doors to let him in and out, and just generally take care of him.  Still, if he is in the house when I come home, he is the first to greet me.  When he does greet me, everything from head to tail shows that he is excited to see me.  It is hard to be stressed when I have such a greeting.

If only we humans could be filled with the spirit that lives in Jasper, what a change it would make in each of us, and the world at large.  In most ways, Jasper lives in a small world or limited life.  Even so, the nature of that world is better because he is in it.

Again, the world, any of us, could use a great infusion of the qualities that are common in the loyal companions we call “our dogs”.  I know I am biased about Jasper.  Still, I think I need to work on having the character that seems to be natural in him.

Russell L. Dyer

December 30, 2025